Break my body, hold my bones
Ridiculous.
The word I repeated as setback upon setback delayed and complicated the journey that two others and I made yesterday to the "Bone Church" of Kutna Hora.
Seemed like a good idea the night before last when I mentioned to an Australian girl I had met in the hostel that I had heard good things and would be taking a day trip. A guy I met in Melbourne told me that a short trip to the town of Kutna Hora (used to be the second largest city in Prague, but now no longer!) would be rewarded with an old church decorated entirely with human bones! How grotesque! But what great pictures I could take, no? Supposedly on the inside was a chandelier made of all the bones of the human body, including mandibles!
I woke up yesterday morning, met up with the Australian girl, as well as an American guy from Seattle at around 10:45. It seemed we had an early enough start. We only had slight trouble finding the train station, but slightly more figuring out when the next train to Kutna Hora would leave. Despite the Let's Go guide claim that the trains run hourly, the next train was not until 2:10 PM. Late, we thought, but since the church closes at 6, we'll still make it in plenty of time. We sat in the train station where we were harassed by a very drunk and possibly homeless Czech man, attempting to sell us batteries, a floppy disk and a plastic picture frame.
We did catch a train, at the correct time. Before getting on, I asked a Czech woman if it was the train to Kutna Hora. "Yes" she seemed to communicate. When 45 minutes later the conductor came by to check our tickets, he yelled at us in Czech that we were on the wrong train and attempted to explain to us the convoluted measures required to get ourselves to famous Kutna Hora and the fabulous Bone Church (which he seemed to be unfamiliar with). Seems that 2 train changes would be required as well as an hour of waiting in the Kolin train station.
Fine, we thought. We'll still get to Kutna Hora by 5, and the church couldn't be far from the train station! We'll still see it!
By the time our hour wait in the Kolin station began, we were all getting a bit tired, especially the Aussie girl. The three of us (basically total strangers) sat in the smokiest bar I have ever seen, surrounded by old, and extremely drunk, red-faced Czech men, talking about procrastinating in college and the book 1984.
"This damn bone church better be pretty good," we said.
"I'm sure it will be!" we agreed.
We arrived in Kutna Hora on time, and were greeted at the station with a large map of the town.
"Perfect," we said. "Let's look for 'bone church' on the map and then walk to it!"
Unfortunately, the bone church was NOT on the map. We did see a large church on the other side of town called St. Barbara's. We assumed that its cartographic prominence must be related to its importance as a tourist site, so split a cab (CHEAP!) to it.
Big, pretty church, with a lovely view of the town, but we start asking around "Is this the bone church? Is this the bone church?" pointing to different parts our bodies trying to convey the word "bone" to people who speak no English.
It was not. We rushed through downtown Kutna Hora, the streets empty, the shops closed, looking for another cab, found one (Seattle waved it down on a deserted street as one might in Manhattan) and were driven to a cemetery.
"Uh oh...I wonder if by "bones" he thought we meant "cemetery"", we considered. By now it was 5:40, and we feared that even if we did find it, it would be closed. We crossed the street to find another church that was not the bone church, and asked around until we discovered that yes, the bone church WAS the cemetery church.
And it was closed.
No bones on the outside. And we didn't see the chandelier. But we did managed to look through some grated windows in the basement to see some big stacks of bones. I took a few pictures, from which you can make out a few illuminated skulls if you look closely.
We waited another hour at the train station for the train back to Prague. Another hour on the train.
And then hot dogs at a stand for dinner.
It was an adventure, I suppose. It's not the destination, but the journey, right?
The word I repeated as setback upon setback delayed and complicated the journey that two others and I made yesterday to the "Bone Church" of Kutna Hora.
Seemed like a good idea the night before last when I mentioned to an Australian girl I had met in the hostel that I had heard good things and would be taking a day trip. A guy I met in Melbourne told me that a short trip to the town of Kutna Hora (used to be the second largest city in Prague, but now no longer!) would be rewarded with an old church decorated entirely with human bones! How grotesque! But what great pictures I could take, no? Supposedly on the inside was a chandelier made of all the bones of the human body, including mandibles!
I woke up yesterday morning, met up with the Australian girl, as well as an American guy from Seattle at around 10:45. It seemed we had an early enough start. We only had slight trouble finding the train station, but slightly more figuring out when the next train to Kutna Hora would leave. Despite the Let's Go guide claim that the trains run hourly, the next train was not until 2:10 PM. Late, we thought, but since the church closes at 6, we'll still make it in plenty of time. We sat in the train station where we were harassed by a very drunk and possibly homeless Czech man, attempting to sell us batteries, a floppy disk and a plastic picture frame.
We did catch a train, at the correct time. Before getting on, I asked a Czech woman if it was the train to Kutna Hora. "Yes" she seemed to communicate. When 45 minutes later the conductor came by to check our tickets, he yelled at us in Czech that we were on the wrong train and attempted to explain to us the convoluted measures required to get ourselves to famous Kutna Hora and the fabulous Bone Church (which he seemed to be unfamiliar with). Seems that 2 train changes would be required as well as an hour of waiting in the Kolin train station.
Fine, we thought. We'll still get to Kutna Hora by 5, and the church couldn't be far from the train station! We'll still see it!
By the time our hour wait in the Kolin station began, we were all getting a bit tired, especially the Aussie girl. The three of us (basically total strangers) sat in the smokiest bar I have ever seen, surrounded by old, and extremely drunk, red-faced Czech men, talking about procrastinating in college and the book 1984.
"This damn bone church better be pretty good," we said.
"I'm sure it will be!" we agreed.
We arrived in Kutna Hora on time, and were greeted at the station with a large map of the town.
"Perfect," we said. "Let's look for 'bone church' on the map and then walk to it!"
Unfortunately, the bone church was NOT on the map. We did see a large church on the other side of town called St. Barbara's. We assumed that its cartographic prominence must be related to its importance as a tourist site, so split a cab (CHEAP!) to it.
Big, pretty church, with a lovely view of the town, but we start asking around "Is this the bone church? Is this the bone church?" pointing to different parts our bodies trying to convey the word "bone" to people who speak no English.
It was not. We rushed through downtown Kutna Hora, the streets empty, the shops closed, looking for another cab, found one (Seattle waved it down on a deserted street as one might in Manhattan) and were driven to a cemetery.
"Uh oh...I wonder if by "bones" he thought we meant "cemetery"", we considered. By now it was 5:40, and we feared that even if we did find it, it would be closed. We crossed the street to find another church that was not the bone church, and asked around until we discovered that yes, the bone church WAS the cemetery church.
And it was closed.
No bones on the outside. And we didn't see the chandelier. But we did managed to look through some grated windows in the basement to see some big stacks of bones. I took a few pictures, from which you can make out a few illuminated skulls if you look closely.
We waited another hour at the train station for the train back to Prague. Another hour on the train.
And then hot dogs at a stand for dinner.
It was an adventure, I suppose. It's not the destination, but the journey, right?
posted by Jed at 2:30 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home